Raccoons: Friends or Foes?

Just got back from seeing Zane and Josh playing an acoustic gig. Little did I know it was not at the Artisan's Cafe, as Facebook had informed me. No. It was in the hookah lounge next door... Thanks for the heads up, Facebook. So it was a little different. But good, nonetheless.

Let's start with something really cool. This is a game called Avalanche. It looks really simple, but this game made four guys stop playing Modern Warfare 2 and stare intently into the computer screen, cheering for the little marshmallow guy. It's fun as hell. Try and beat my record: 518 ft. I don't know what the all-time high is, but it's probably some ridiculous number that no human or android could ever reach...

In the News

Raccoons are not to be trusted. Apparently, a single raccoon managed to knock out power to a section of downtown Memphis for five hours. Why? The motives are as of yet unclear, but police suspect this is the first in a series of outages staged to make us succumb to the demands of the raccoon army... The full article is here.

This next story is about a couple who will never be in the running for "Parents of the Year." So picture this: a 52-year-old man and his 30-year-old wife or girlfriend or something, have their 1-year-old and 4-year-old son in a stroller and are pushing them down the street at 1 AM. Did I mention the parents were drunk? And also that the kids were in the stroller next to cases of booze? And also a double-edged bayonet?... I didn't? Oh, well it's all true. And that's why they are arguably the worst parents ever. Here's the full article.

Time for the first video. Many people have seen zombie movies, but few know what to do in case of a zombie attack. Zombie Awareness Day has already passed, but it is still important to know how to stay alive when zombies come to eat your brain.



Well, I can't seem to find anymore cool videos tonight... So we'll end with this video of an iPhone 4 being shot by a .50 Cal.



You know, maybe if the iPhone had some useful apps, it wouldn't suck so much. But I'm tired of every fucker with an iPhone saying "Dude, check out my iGun, and my iLightsaber..." I got an idea, Apple: How about putting in a real gun. That way we can use our phone for self-defense... or to rob liquor stores... or to shoot Apple execs in the face... Or how about an app that puts out fires?
"Oh no, my stove is on fire!"
"Don't worry, I've got my iPhone with a built in fire extinguisher!"
"My hero!"
But no, it's all stupid fucking nonsense. And any fucker can upload an app. Cuz shit like that has worked in the past... Maybe that's the real problem. Maybe that's where all the stupid apps come from... But it was Apple's idea to allow for that in the first place...

~Christian